Stress on Children's Development

My Home Environment

Forms of stress can be internal, external, or both (Jackson, 2008; Jewitt & Peterson, 2002). External stress can come from the child’s environment. Some of these external sources of stress exist within a child’s family. I think I was the victim of both.

When I think of stress growing up I can clearly remember the climate of my environment and what was expected from my siblings and me. My siblings and I had the role of “staying in a child’s place” as my dad would say. My dad was the head of the house, the provider, the maker and enforcer of rules and routines. My dad made most of the rules. Rules were to be followed with no questions asked. Rules may be agreements or not, which enforce and restrict the actions of a family member. They give power; they induce shame and resentment; they govern or restrict others’ behaviors (Morgaine, 2001). That is the way he grew up, the way his environment in the military had trained him, and the way he ran our household. I never questioned what he said, not only from respect but from fear of the consequences.

The climate of my family was very intense. My parents had different parenting styles. My parents’ parenting styles clashed quite often, but my dad allows had the last say. My dad used an authoritarian style of parenting, that tough love. His one-way method of connection was high demandingness, low responsiveness, many rules, and a no-tolerance policy to unacceptable behavior. He was in full control and negotiation was not an option. Everyone was on their “p’s and “q’s” when my dad was around, even my mom. Our home was run like a military environment. I was the lost ad scared child when he was around. I tried to stay out of sight and away from any drama.

Besides his strict handedness, he also had an alcohol addiction. There were many nights he would come in late intoxicated and begin arguing and fighting my mother. We were always scared when this happened. I once came out of my bedroom to see what was going on and saw him putting his hands on my mother and told him to leave my mommy alone, he turns around and shoved me to the ground. These were some fearful nights, and always left me with a sick feeling in the stomach feeling, a headache, a racing heart rate, a dry mouth, and worrying about what might happen next or the next time was always there.

When you are young you don’t understand the word stress, as much as fear, however, I know now that I was under a stressful and fearful environment whenever my father was around. I think I used reading books to suppress my stress. I enjoyed reading fairy tales and I think that is why I value books even today. My mother was also there to reassure us that everything would be alright. My mother was there to buffers or absorbs some of the shocks of the stress, shielding me and allowing me to develop well in the face of a dysfunctional family environment.

I read that children have great resilience as they overcome the odds. Resilience is the ability to recover relatively quickly from misfortune without being overwhelmed or acting in dysfunctional ways (Werner, 2004 as cited in Henderson, 2013). I think that I was able to adapt optimistically under the stressful conditions of my home life.

References

Henderson, N. (2013). Havens of resilence. Educational Leadership, 71 (1). 22-27. Retrieved from https://eds-a-ebscohost-com.ezp.waldenulibrary.org/eds/detail/detail?vid=1&sid=931a3ee1-aa33-4a24-947e-2c388a8ea074%40sessionmgr4008&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWRzLWxpdmUmc2NvcGU9c2l0ZQ%3d%3d#AN=EJ1032659&db=eric

Jewett, J. & Peterson, K. (2008, October). Stress and young children. The International Child and Youth Care Network, 116. Retrieved from https://www.cyc-net.org/cyc-online/cyconline-oct2008-jewett.html

Morgaine, C. (2001). Family system theory. Retrieved from http://web.pdx.edu/~cbcm/CFS410U/FamilySystemsTheory.pdf

Nadia Murad

I watched a documentary on 60 Minutes about Nadia Murad an Iraqi woman that was captured by Islamic State ISIS as a young teen an I became intrigued by her story and her journey. Spoke about the use of sexual violence as a weapon of war and armed conflict. She earned the Nobel Peace Prize in 2018 for her dedication to helping women and children victimized by genocide, mass atrocities, and human trafficking to heal and rebuild their lives and communities.

Nadia was held as a slave where she was beaten, burned with cigarettes, and raped. She was able to successfully escape when her captor left the door unlocked. She was taken in by a family that was able to smuggle her out of the Islamic State where she managed to make her way to a refugee camp.

Iraqi Children and the Effects of War

I think children of war face the most horrific life journeys of all. They are seeing and being affected by daily explosions, killings, abductions, threatening noises, rapes, and turmoil in Iraq’s cities and villages. Those that live to talk about tell stories that tear at your heart. In addition to witnessing fighting and bloodshed, children are faced with a host of other challenges. "The fundamental requirements of existence are disrupted by military conflict: classrooms, health services, sufficient housing, water and food"(Smith, 2003 p. 29). That makes it challenging for families to have an atmosphere for children that encourages balanced cognitive and social growth.

Some children have family members captured or murdered during the fighting while some are abducted from their homes and coerced into entering armies. Others are divided while escaping. The loss of family places considerable stress on children. Discrimination and assault can contribute to the formation of identity of themselves as victims so they may become aggressive to guard against future acts of violence. For war-affected children, severe losses and disruptions of their lives contribute to high levels of depression and anxiety.

The post children of Iraqi wars are affected by traumatic stress disorder. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) leaves them with traumatic mental scars. PTSD in children can affect their brain and lead to long-term effects that will alter their development (Chelala, 2009). For war-affected children, severe losses and disruptions of their lives contribute to high levels of depression and anxiety. Children under the age of 5 years may react to stress having separation anxiety, bed-wetting, regression in their development, and nightmares. To counteract the effects of such traumatic events young children will often fantasize that the events did not happen or that they prevented them from happening in some form of play or reenactment (Macsoud, 2000).

Besides the permanent physical and mental scars Iraqi children suffer from the exposure to heavy metals, neurotoxins, ammunition left from the war and hunger. "Approximately 500,000 Iraqi children are acutely malnourished or underweight. These children are particularly vulnerable to disease and death "(International Study Team, 2003).

References

Chelala, C. (2009, March 21). Iraqi children: The scars of war. Retrieved from https://www.theglobalist.com/iraqi-children-bearing-the-scars-of-war/

International Study Team. ( 2003, January 30). Our common responsibility: The impact of a new war on Iraqi children. Retrieved from https://reliefweb.int/report/iraq/our-common-responsibility-impact-new-war-iraqi-children

Macksoud, M. (2000). Helping children cope with the stress of war. Retrieved from https://www.unicef.org/publications/files/Helping_Children_Cope_with_the_Stresses_of_War.pdf

Pelley, S. (2020, July 19). Nadia Murad's vow to take ISIS to court, and her heartbreaking. return to home. Retrieved from https://www.cbsnews.com/news/nobel-peace-prize-recipient-nadia-murad-and-amal-clooney-vow-to-take-isis-to-court-60-minutes-2020-07-19/

Smith, D. (2001, September). Children in the heat of war. Monitor (32) 8 Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/monitor/sep01/childwar